“In struggling against anguish one never produces serenity; the struggle against anguish only produces new forms of anguish.”

-- Simone Weil

A woman who has just lost one of her two year old triplets has asked if I might offer a message that would get her closer to the light at this tragic time.

I am at a loss for words. I have no experience of this deep a loss, so how could I possibly address it? Even if I had, my experience would not be the same as hers, and would my sharing be helpful?

The one thing I do know in this context is that my society denies grief. In my view, we do not grieve enough to bring healing. I also suspect that so many of our gestures of condolences completely miss their mark.

I invited this woman to write to me of the truth of her experience, because I believe that speaking our truth openly and honestly to someone who truly hears does bring some measure of healing. If you have any other gifts to offer for this situation, please share them with everyone on the ‘women at heart’ forum.

“The human heart dares not stay away too long from that which hurt it most. There is a return journey to anguish that few of us are released from making.”