A FRAMEWORK FOR CHANGE

"All birth is unwilling."

-- Pearl S. Buck

Hi Patrice,

Sorry I have been so out of touch lately but my life has been scrambled. We sold our house while I was at Jeddah Mali's retreat in late July, so as soon as I returned, I dived into packing. On August 16th, we moved from a suburban single family home to an 18th floor apartment on the edge of downtown.

BIG CHANGES! It hasn't just been our possessions in a state of disarray. My thinking and emotions have been, too. So I received a gift when my close friend Bonnie Hutchinson shared the five stages of the soul transformation process identified by Michael Mirdad in his book, You're Not Going Crazy, You're Just Waking Up! The stages are:

1. Dismantling
2. Emptiness,
3. Disorientation
4. Rebuilding
5. Your new life.

I am clearly in the disorientation stage right now, and what a relief it is to have the turmoil validated. In my heart, I know I am ready for something completely new and different. I KNOW deep within that I'm ready to see a bigger picture of my life -- hence my eagerness to live with expansive vistas of the sky and world around me.

Yet part of me clings to the familiar and the powerful memories of life in my former house. Part of me fears dramatic change and the need to adjust to a radically different lifestyle and environment.

I haven't read the Mirdad book so I don't know what he recommends for dealing with this phase. Still, I know from experience that being gentle with myself, releasing resistance to accept whatever comes up mentally and emotionally, and giving myself as much time and space as I need to ease into my new life will serve me best. I'm not going crazy... I'm changing.

~ Patrice

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."

-- Alan Cohen