“It is not heroin or cocaine that makes one an addict, it is the need to escape from a harsh reality.”

-- Shirley Chisholm

I suffered with low self-esteem most of my life. Because I felt so insecure, it wasn’t possible to develop friendships at school. I wanted desperately to attend college but my dad convinced me that young girls in the 1940’s got married and raised a family. So I married a man and gave birth to five children in six and one-half years. He was the man of the house. I had no identity of my own. And because I wanted to fit in, I became a people pleaser.

Unable to cultivate friendships with neighbors or friends, I turned to food because eating took away the pain of my esteem problems. I eventually joined Weight Watchers. Later, I became an alcoholic. I joined AA and found sobriety but didn’t find how to love myself. I later became addicted again to prescription drugs. It took an addiction known as compulsive gambling to awaken the spirit in me and allow me to find my God.

By attending meetings, I learned to love myself and realized I am a good person. The members shared their stories on coping skills and a relationship with my Higher Power.

Today I can cope with life’s issues and challenges with the tools I’ve been given by my new friends. I have learned how to set healthy boundaries, plan realistic goals, live a day at a time, and accept life on life’s terms.

In June I will celebrate my 78th birthday. I apply make-up each morning, work part-time, occasionally date a sweet gentleman, go dancing, pursue my favorite hobbies, attend two writing groups, and for the past ten years, I have written a Newsletter on-line to help other women who have addiction problems.

Today, I’m closer to my God, my family and my friends than I’ve ever been in my life. I found the little girl within and I have self-confidence, pride, and a feeling of self-worth and look forward to new challenges.

If I think I can, I can; If I think I can’t, I can’t.

~ Marilyn Lancelot

If addictions are an issue for you or someone you love, please visit Marilyn’s websites:
Women Helping Women: http://www.femalegamblers.org
Gripped by Gambling: http://www.grippedbygambling.com