Being right or being happy is the choice I face. A line from a popular song "Hurts so good" comes to mind. That musical refrain grabs my attention as I wrestle with feelings of anger and hurt. Being right feels so good at the same time it causes much pain.

I can list all the ways in which I have not been treated fairly and have that self-righteous feeling which is satisfying because I like being right. But the price to be paid is mental anguish and it isn't just a one time price. Like a tooth ache it remains until something is done about it.

A lifetime of conditioning makes it difficult to see that in every situation, we have a choice of how we act and think. The choice: spend endless hours in anguish as we come up with reason after reason to back up how right we are, or let go of the anguish and see that each person does about as well as s/he can. The universal is that fear, anger, hurt are behind each annoying behavior of another person. Perhaps compassion is the answer.

~ Judy Walden

“Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation. It's not what they're not doing or should be doing that's the issue. The issue is your own chosen response to the situation and what you should be doing. If you start to think the problem is ‘out there,’ stop yourself. That thought is the problem.”